It’s one thing to be the dean and to speak to parents about the hypothetical experience of sending your child off to college.
It’s a whole different thing when the dean is a Mom this time around.
Seventeen-year-old Tom waved a big white envelope emblazoned with “A Home for the Mind, Heart and Spirit,” in front of my face, his smile as big as the sky. “Looks like I am going to college,” he cheered.
Seton Hall University will never be the same.
I have renewed respect for the process we parents must endure in order to send our young adults off to college. I know that sympathetic parents lament what their children must go through — SAT prep, SAT testing, college visits, applications, and so on — but for the self-centered among us, it’s all about me and my nagging! So many things to oversee.
In one way, it’s actually gotten simpler since my older two were high school seniors and applications had to be filled out neatly in pen. It is still a daunting task. Unless you are one of the lucky ones (like me!) whose children know where they want to go to college, students are filling out more applications than ever. One mother told me her son’s guidance office suggested applying to 10 schools!
A selective nagging strategy worked well in the Gottlieb house. I let things slide — even though it was gnawing at me — until we (read that, he) needed to absolutely swing in to action and then I would nag, nag, nag until the chore — the college essay, the application, the extracurricular activity sheet, fill in the blank — was complete. That’s how we got to the moment where we pressed the submit button and breathed a sigh of relief. I am not advocating this as a best practice, but it did work for us quite nicely.
Now that the decision has been made, the burden shifts to my husband and me. We need to tackle without procrastination a job we normally delay until about April 13: our income taxes. But April 15 needs to be backed up by several weeks so that we can meet a more daunting deadline. As parents of incoming freshmen or returning students, we all must have our student’s FAFSA (Free Application for Federal Student Aid) complete and filed by March 1.
I have been supervising the Financial Aid department since August and, thus, have been privy to all sorts of heart-wrenching stories. Some of the stories could have had happier endings if the student’s FAFSA had been filed in time to be considered for state and federal aid and for Seton Hall’s limited pot of need-based aid.
The FAFSA isn’t that hard, but it does take organizational skills: what the heck is this kid’s Social Security number and has any one seen last month’s bank statement? In order to complete all the information, you will need:
- Social Security numbers for parents and student
- Your student’s driver’s license
- Your student’s W-2 forms and other records of income
- Your 2009 income tax records
- Your student’s 2009 income tax records
- Bank statements for you and your student
- Business and mortgage information
- If your student is male and over 18, his Selective Service registration
- An alien registration or permanent resident card if you are not a citizen
If the task still invokes fear, log on to the SHU web site’s financial aid page and you can watch a clever short video about the FAFSA. There is also a link to the government’s FAFSA form.
Remember, we are always nagging our students to be prepared and to meet their deadlines. Now the onus is on us. Let’s make one of the primary resolutions for 2010 (in addition to losing the baby weight we gained with the birth of these college-age students!) to tackle our taxes and file our FAFSA so that if there is any free money out there, our students can be in line to earn it.
Links that can help:
FAFSA: www.fafsa.ed.gov
5-minute YouTube FAFSA video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kor_9cK593M
SHU financial aid: http://www.shu.edu/applying/undergraduate/financial-info/financial-aid.cfm